The Fail-Proof Plan

Now, this post will have to be short and sweet. I’m sure you’re okay with that, because, goddammit, we all have work to do. So I’m going to rapid-fire the ways I’m accommodating for my lack of car.

1. I’m saving every dime I can and am foregoing the lavish social life I’d like.

2. I used some of those saved dimes to purchase a condenser microphone, a stand and a mixer. Seems like an unnecessary toy in the face of my career, right? Ha! Little did you know that I’m also going to be a voice actor. I’ll do cartoons, commercials, narration — you name it, and I’ll scream my voice all over it. I like to think my resonant, sultry, corny baritone pipes will take me places. So while I experience the crippling lack of car, my career can still be nourished and prosper from inside my own home!

3. I’m taking time to meditate on who I am and what I really want — something a lot more important for the driven soul than is given credit. I’ve often found myself running full speed ahead toward a goal before I had to catch myself and ask whether I really wanted it. I’m convinced that I want to make movies, but I haven’t yet found the type of movie I want to make. Do I want to lighten people’s moods? Or should I follow the red hot activist boiling just under the surface? Maybe I just want to take people to a crazy and absurd world full of whimsical horrors and childhood fears.

4. For that matter, I’m just going to start writing. For that past few years, I’ve let my imagination limit itself to what’s immediately practical. As far as a personal budget goes, that limits me to holding my iPhone camera and recording an experimental short based on a thriller starring the protagonist, a scurrying ant, and the evil Doctor Magnifying Glass. Hilarity ensues when he gets stuck in the vegetarian spider web. No word on how I’ll cast the vegetarian spider. Point is, I need to start writing, big bad budget be damned.

5. I will STILL apply to any and every relatively reputable film crew I can find. Even if it means scouring Craigslist for gigs every couple of hours. Almost all of them require automobiles, of course, but I may just find that one needle I need from the professional haystack.

And there it is. That’s my plan. If I had to be concise about it, I’d say I’m solving my woes with creativity and stubbornness. Not convinced it’s solid? Me neither! If I wanted guaranteed stability, I’d stay with Barnes and Noble and crown myself store manager.

I’ll let you know how it plays out in the meantime.

Ah, and here’s my destination. Time to step off the bus.


About Max

I make puns and movies.
This entry was posted in Automobile, Creating, Day Jobbing, Determination, Happiness, Plan, Public Transportation. Bookmark the permalink.

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